EXCUSES, EXCUSES, EXCUSES!

EXCUSES, EXCUSES, EXCUSES!

Apparently, Americans are great at coming up with excuses, to the tune of over 2000, on average, per person, per year. YIKES! 

Here’s some great and not-so-great excuses for being late to work.

1.      I overslept (my alarm didn’t go off)

2.      Honestly, I just laid down for five minutes….

3.      My kids are sick. ( I don’t even have kids)

4.      My Grandmother died (Again?)

5.      There was an accident on the BLAH BLAH BLAH Freeway (No reported accidents)

6.      The elevator was stuck (It’s a one floor building)

7.      I stopped to get donuts for everyone! I actually do this. No one is mad if you’re late if you saunter in like a champ carrying a dozen donuts. 

8.      There was a water main break on the corner of Bullshit and Nofucking Way. 

9.      I was tossing off in the shower and my fantasy ran a little longer than expected. But hey, I’m in a great mood!

10.   My trick from last night just wouldn’t leave. 

Hope this helps! Have a great Tuesday.

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Thanks!

Ted and Larry

Helmet Grease – because your arsenal deserves a great polish!